The fragility of life

I have been a collaborator with the Marist Brothers in Cambodia for the last two years. I help them to raise funds for their community work and for the poor. But alas, I am no longer young and healthy and raising fund like planting rice is never fun. One of the Marist brothers has taken much effort to write a report on Pailin but somehow his report did not move many hearts. It has been three weeks since I started asking for financial assistance but only two people responded.

Some people commented “Oh, awesome work” and that’s it. I am not the least encouraged, in fact it makes me terribly sad and I want to give up “asking for the widow’s mite”. I want to shout to God to send someone else for I cannot move any hearts. Last Sunday, I watched with awe and a heavy heart the amount of money raised at the President’s Star Charity Night... a whopping S$5.7 million and here I am “begging” for USD7,100 to employ two teachers, buy 10 used computer, build a library for 100+ children in Pailin without any result. What a setback!

Just as I was about to give up, forget about what fund-raising and just mind my own business… I received a mail this morning from a Marist novice desperately asking for help for his aged parents and mentally ill brother as flood has destroyed their entire rice crop. I also read a blog written by Brian… “We were saddened recently when a young man collapsed at our centre here in Pailin, soon after he died in the local hospital. We do not know the cause of his death but it did bring home to all of us the fragility of life. I was struck by the fact that for many of our students at the centre, their life is one of poverty, one which many go about with a quiet dignity. It is the same of them in death. There was no great funeral procession for Vuthy, just a simple time of mourning in his family home a mere hour after his passing. I think that some of the local people were wondering who the white man was who was there viewing the body and saying his silent prayers for the deceased but my presence was respected and Vuthy’s short life was honoured.” People pass away every day, but unless we lose someone that we know personally, our own death may not be something that we think about frequently. So, who is Vuthy???? It’s like every now and again we need reminders of our place on earth and just how fleeting life is.

The fragility of life… is it a wake up call? Who knows what tomorrow will bring? But for today, I know God has touched my heart to do something for Sytha and the children in Pailin. Life is fragile and hence we ought to be grateful. We never know what difficulties we may encounter one day when we have to shout to the Lord to save us just as we do not know how others are suffering now and why we reject to be God’s instrument to their prayers. Perhaps one day, we may have to rely on these very people whom we refuse to help today.

We work hard to achieve success, acquire wealth, fill the aching voids in our heart, and to look good, (read carefully it’s to look good not do good) in society. Often times, we give very little thought to what is beyond this life. We are caught up in ensuring a comfortable life for ourselves here and now. Then one day when it hits us that life is fragile and fleeting, we find that all we have chased after here on earth will not save us when it comes to eternity.

What are you really looking for in life?

Once you look deeper, beyond your desire for a bigger house or a fancier car, you will most likely discover that what you're truly searching for is not more "stuff," but more happiness, more joy, more peace. It may seem some people are born with enjoyment for life programmed into their hardwiring, whereas for others finding happiness seems an elusive goal. But, like any programming, yours can be changed.

If you haven't taken the time to explore what brings joy to your life on a regular basis, you may realize you don't even know what brings you happiness anymore. If that's the case, try out different things, including some you've never done before. The answers just might surprise you.....

Be grateful. Incorporate a daily gratitude session where you identify something you are grateful for. You can express your gratitude in any number of ways: silently say "thank you," call or email the person you want to thank, or devise your own gratitude ritual. No one has everything, and everyone has something of sorrow intermingled with gladness of life. The trick is to make the laughter outweigh the tears. We cannot change the past, but we can enjoy today, and look to the future.

Take time to savor life. Cut down the rushing from one thing to the next – delegate or say no – to reduce your number of appointments and daily tasks. Stop gossiping. Be selective about the information you expose yourself to. It can have an incredible impact on your level of personal happiness.

Laugh now! When you're in the middle of a mess, look around you and realize the absurdity of the moment. Remind yourself that a year from now, no one will care, and you'll probably be laughing about it anyway, so why wait? Laugh about it now! One of the major causes of stress is worrying about things that are out of your control. Learn to recognize these things and if you can truly do nothing about them, then just let them go. Take time to laugh at yourself and the situations you find yourself in. Laughter is a powerful, positive medicine and the calmer and more peaceful you can take things, the happier your life will be.

Wish the best for others and mean it. It is so easy to be jealous and petty and forget to celebrate the good fortune of your coworkers, friends and family. Do what you can for those less fortunate than yourself.

Get involved. Be a volunteer. Be yourself. You can't please everybody. Don't let criticism worry you. Don't compare yourself to other people be it at work or in your personal life. Build friendship. Surround yourself with friends who are positive, encouraging, and helpful. We all need this continuing, positive encouragement to make solid positive progress in life.

Happiness is important for so many reasons, beyond the obvious fact that most people would prefer to be happy rather than not. There is little doubt about the powerful effects positive emotions can have on your physical health and well-being. If you can become happier, you will help build a better world. If you can improve your ability to address stresses and negative emotions, you're more likely to be able to do the things that no one would claim are trivial. Building positive emotions through humour is one of the most natural things you can do to bring joy to your work, and broaden your view of this world in which we live. Happiness isn't so much something you strive for but a spontaneous natural result of pursuing your God-given mission in life -- and following a natural lifestyle that allows your body to function at its highest possible level.

Who will cry when you die?

We live in an era where we have forgotten what life is all about. We live in a world of broken promises, in a time when people treat their words lightly. Saying things we do not really mean and therefore losing credibility and breaking the bonds of trust which ultimately leads to a string of broken relationship.

Every time we fail to do the right thing, we reinforce the habit of doing wrongs. Every time we refuse to tell the truth, we feed the habit of lying. Our thoughts and actions form our world and what we think and do grow into our inner being.

As Woodrow Wilson said, "You are not here to merely make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand." Yet we have lost touch with our humanity and our purpose. We have lost sight of the things that matter the most.

If we live a lousy life, who will cry when we die? What impact will our lives have on the generations that follow? What legacy are we leaving behind after we have taken our last breath? Don't wait till it's too late before we discover what life is all about. The purpose of life is a life of purposes.

What is the meaning of life?

What is the meaning of life? Is it the meaning of being human or the meaning of life to each individual living it? If we're all going to be dead in the end anyway, what difference does it make as to what we do with our lives? Does the finality of death make life meaningless? Perhaps it is better to talk about its significance, authenticity, importance, rather than meaning itself. Human beings could choose their ends with the sovereignty to define their own meaning for their lives. Even if there no answer to the question of meaning of life, there is still the need to get through day to day. People who believe in God could still find their lives meaningless while on the other hand, atheists who have significant missions and relationships could feel their lives overflowing with meaning. What does meaning mean? Throughout the centuries, different philosophers have different answers. Existentialists find no meaning in life. Wittgenstein reckoned the question itself is meaningless. To the Darwinians, the meaning of life is evolution and more life. Perhaps the question is not so much about the meaning of life, but about living it….“How should I live?” and finding something beyond to discover an answer. If we ask the question “How to live life to the fullest?”, we probably get a whole new lot of answers.

Is the unexamined life worth living?

Socrates' bold statement that "The unexamined life is not worth living" has fascinated many. What is outstanding about him is that he called a spade a spade, he doesn't mince words. He doesn't say that the unexamined life is "less meaningful than it could be" or "one of many possible responses to human existence" just simply and clearly that it's not even worth living.

Why does he make such strong and unequivocal statement? Socrates believed that the purpose of human life is one of personal and spiritual growth. We are unable to grow beyond greater understanding of our true nature unless we take time to examine and reflect upon our life. Deeper contemplation yields understanding of our subconscious mind under the iceberg. Unless we are aware of our hidden nature, much of our life is unconscious repetition. It's a radical necessity to start contemplating on our life and to Socrates, that is what really matters.

"He who does not remember the past is condemned to repeat it." - Santayana